Are you struggling to figure out how to pick yourself up when you hit rock bottom? Start by giving yourself some credit for realizing that you’ve hit the bottom and are ready to start that difficult climb. Embrace all the negative emotions that come with hitting this stage in your life, including regret, hopelessness, shock, and fatigue with life in general.
The great thing about emotions is that they don’t stop you from taking action. Action is exactly what you will need to climb up from the bottom, so commit right now to feeling the emotions but not allowing them to control you. You have some important work to do, and it’s going to require all of the following:
- Determination
- Clarity
- Honesty
- Strategy
You need to dig deep to tap into your personal determination, find clarity on what you want your life to look like in the future, and then follow through with staying honest with yourself. What you do today determines your future, so let’s discuss some ideas that will help you strategize your great comeback.
Reach Out without Guilt
What do you think when you hear about a celebrity spending a time in a drug addiction treatment center? What about the mom who leaves her children behind to seek treatment for an eating disorder? And the gambling addict who calls wife every time he passes a casino to stop himself from stopping the car?
Addictions are often developed as coping mechanisms. They’re supposed to make you feel good and get you through the hard times. Unfortunately, they end up giving you a new set of problems that are even more difficult to overcome.
There’s no shame in reaching out for help and admitting yourself into outpatient alcohol rehab or another treatment program. In fact, that’s exactly what you should do if you’re ready to learn how to pick yourself up when you hit rock bottom.
What addictions will make it harder for you to accomplish your goals in the future? What is getting in your way right now? Admitting you need help and reaching out to get that help is the first action you need to take. Your life will look different once you have a sober, clear mind to process your options.
Get Outdoors
Spending time in nature is one of the fastest and most effective ways to lift your spirits and open your mind to new possibilities. The fresh air and exposure to trees, lakes, and other elements of nature is proven to help with depression. You may also find that you get a surge of energy once you’re away from the smog of the city.
Here are some ways to get outdoors and let the fresh air lift your spirits:
- Look up the state and national parks in your area. Even if you have to drive a bit to reach them, these parks are a great resource for hiking trails, fishing lakes, and beautiful gardens.
- Plan a weekend camping trip. Bring along your mentors, role models, and others who support and inspire you to continue learning how to pick yourself up when you hit rock bottom. If you have little ones that aren’t ready for an outdoor sleepover, contact local child care agencies and practice asking for help. A background-checked, reliable caregiver can take care of your babies while you’re out exploring nature.
- Start or end each day with a brisk walk around your neighborhood or a local park. The park down the street or the loop around your child’s school can come in handy here. It’s important to commit to walking a certain length of time at a given time of day. That leaves no room to put it off over and over, ensuring you never get around to it. Make walking a habit.
- Join an outdoor group exercise class. Everything from water Zumba to boot camp is now taught outdoors. Check your local gyms and fitness centers as well as the YMCA in your area to see what classes are offered.
Walk Away from Dead Relationships
If there’s one thing that will stop you from discovering how to pick yourself up when you hit rock bottom, it’s a bad relationship. We’re not just talking about romantic relationships. From the friend who only responds to your messages when she wants something to the cousin who is always begging you for money that you know they will never repay, friendships and familial ties can become just as draining and toxic as love interests.
Here are some signs that someone in your life is no longer compatible with the life you want to live:
- You feel drained of energy after speaking with them or spending time with them.
- You cry more than you laugh due to the nature of the relationship.
- You’re bored and simply don’t have any fun with this person anymore.
- You can’t be yourself around this person because they will judge you, put you down, or otherwise act negatively towards you.
- They don’t support you or get excited for you when something good happens to you.
- You do drugs, drink alcohol, or otherwise participate in addictive behaviors with them. More importantly, they won’t support you getting sober.
- They discourage you from doing the hard work to change your life. Either they don’t believe in your ability to succeed or they benefit in some way from holding you right where you are at this moment.
If you recognize some of these signs, you have a relationship that may not help you figure out how to pick yourself up when you hit rock bottom. What should you do about that? Start by limiting your interactions with that person to see what your life feels like without them.
Next, it’s possibly time to visit that family law attorney to discuss a divorce or stop responding to text messages from that friend who sucks your energy dry. Have no guilt about putting yourself first for once. It’s time to get off the rocky bottom and climb to safety. Not everyone is willing to come with you. Others just aren’t ready to come even if they desperately want you in their lives. You don’t have to cut all relationships off entirely. Sometimes, the people you love most have to remain at arm’s length. That means you may speak to them and see them at times, but you don’t give them complete access to your thoughts and daily activities.
Find Your People
While you’re busy cutting people out of your life, what about adding a few people into the inner circle? Reaching out for divorce assistance or refusing to call the bail bond companies when that special someone is arrested yet again may leave a hole in your life. The good news is that there are many positive, emotionally healthy, supportive people who are ready to fill that space if you let them.
How do you find those people? It’s a personal journey, but we have some suggestions that help you come up with a strategy for meeting really great people:
- Volunteer at catholic charities, homeless shelters, and other agencies in your area. Places that welcome those in need and provide services free of charge are magnets for good people who want to make a difference in the world. The simple act of serving others who are worse off than you may give you a new perspective on your own life, and you will meet some of those great people that will have a positive influence on your life.
- Learn something new. Preferably, learn something that you can turn into a profit in the future. Maybe you’ll learn how to become a gold buyer or go back to school to become a social worker. The options are endless. What do you want to become in the next phase of your life, and what training or certification do you need to get there? Educational programs are often filled with ambitious people who are doing great things in life.
- Tap into your social circle a bit deeper. Do you know someone trustworthy, respectable, and downright amazing? Why not ask them to introduce you to some of their friends? If they know that you’re trying hard to figure out how to pick yourself up when you hit rock bottom, they may not mind connecting you with other people who can help you along the way.
See the Silver Lining in this Dark Cloud
Are you beating yourself up for hitting rock bottom? Do you have a lot of regret and embarrassment over the way you have chosen to live your life to this point? If so, now is the time to give yourself the gift of compassion.
Whenever you have a negative thought about yourself, twist it into a positive in your mind. Keep telling yourself that there is an advantage in everything you’re going through right now.
Here are some examples of how to do this:
The Thought: I can’t let anyone find out about this. No one will ever trust me or respect me again!
The Positive Twist: I need to share this with people who will understand and may benefit from my experiences. They will trust and respect me because they know that I’m being open and honest about my experiences and am working hard to become a better person.
The Thought: I don’t belong here. Everyone is so accomplished, and I’m a nobody. I need to escape.
The Positive Twist: Everyone here is more successful than me, and I can learn so much from them. I need to make connections, pass out my business card, establish a friend or two in higher places. This is my chance to network my way to something amazing.
Remember, the only people who will ever look down at you and try to make you feel bad about your past are those already below you. Most successful people are quite friendly and will do anything possible to help someone trying to sincerely learn how to pick yourself up when you hit rock bottom.
You just have to hold your head high and trust that you belong wherever you land. There is a place for you. You’re figuring out how to pick yourself up when you hit rock bottom one day at a time, and you can’t run from who you are right now. All you can do is improve yourself, learn from your past, and help others climb off that rocky bottom as well.
Move Beyond Your Mind
Turning those thoughts into positivities is critical to overcoming this low point in your life, but so is action. You don’t need an overwhelming life plan or a set of 10 goals. What you need is clarity on what you want for your life. You can then wake up each day as if you’re on a mission to make that life your reality.
What does the next phase of your life look like if you really give yourself permission to dream? What can you do today to take one baby step toward making that life your reality?
This isn’t what you can think or say or have someone else do in the future. What can YOU do TODAY?
Go do it. Don’t give yourself time to mentally back out. Don’t allow those emotions to deter you. Go do it.
Don’t Let the Extreme Scare You
Have you ever thought about going back to school because you see so many local CNA jobs in your area? Do you sometimes wish you could put child up for adoption so that you’re free to live your life with less stress? These may seem like radical ideas that are out of your reach, but here’s the truth you need to hear: Nothing is impossible.
When you think of something that would change your life for the better, don’t dismiss it so fast. Allow it to knock around in your mind as you go about determining how to pick yourself up when you hit rock bottom. Make a list of ways you could possibly make it happen, and don’t dismiss those ideas outright, either.
Is it crazy and impossible? Or is it just difficult and a bit scary?
You can handle difficult. You’re strong.
You can face fear and keep moving forward to better your life.
Don’t dismiss the radical. If it will lead you to a better life and it’s possible, there’s just one question to answer:
How uncomfortable are you willing to get in order to see that radical idea become your reality?
Figuring out how to pick yourself up when you hit rock bottom and changing your life requires some sacrifice. It’s difficult to stay where you are right now. It’s difficult to make change and move forward to something new.
Which difficult will you choose?
